After a sudden and brief battle with cancer, Thomas Robert Abrams, 76, passed away in his home surrounded by his daughters on December 18, 2025. 

Thomas or Tommy, never Tom, was a man driven by curiosity. Born on September 26th in St. Louis, Missouri, he was a loving father and devoted cat dad. An Eagle Scout in his youth, he carried the Boy Scout motto, “Be Prepared,” throughout his life whether through the “emergency nuts” kept in his car console or the carefully saved glass jars he used to store dry goods. He truly put the “reuse” in reduce, reuse, recycle.

Tommy touched the lives of many with his profound sense of humor, thoughtfulness, patience, wit, and wisdom. He was a generous friend with a unique ability to connect with just about anyone, both in person and online. A prolific giver of nicknames, if you knew Tommy well, there’s a good chance he had one for you. This gift for connection was evident in the outpouring of support from friends far and wide, spanning relationships that lasted decades as well as those formed only weeks ago.

Following in the footsteps of his father and grandfather, Tommy built a career in hotels and hospitality after graduating from the University of Missouri-Kansas City. This work shaped much of his adult life, taking him from city to city and always leading him to the best eats and new friendships wherever he went. Over time, however, the demands of the industry grew tiring, and in his 50s he bravely chose to begin again. He returned to school to learn about computers and evolved into the patient, hospitality-driven, IT specialist that defined his later life. He worked at Wells Fargo for 20 years, forming some of his strongest friendships, until retiring in 2020. He often said he “got to go to work,” and genuinely enjoyed helping his “customers.”

Retirement did not slow Tommy’s desire to be of service to others. He became an AmeriCorps service member at the Northeast Branch of the Kansas City Public Library, where he provided technical support to patrons, particularly those on the margins who were often overlooked. While the help he gave was technical in nature, it was Tommy himself who made every patron feel safe, seen, and supported. He also volunteered at the Liberty Silver Center in Liberty, Missouri providing technical support to other seniors during Tech Tuesdays with Tommy.

Throughout his life, Tommy found connection with others through music, often forming friendships around a shared love of a favorite artist or composer, whether Johnny Rivers, Jethro Tull, or Dvořák. He kept a pair of chopsticks in his car, always ready to drum along to a song that struck the right rhythm. In 2024, he fulfilled a lifelong dream of hearing The New World Symphony performed live in Prague. True to his nature, he made new friends while traveling through Europe and met in person, for the first time, a pen pal he had corresponded with for decades.

Tommy believed deeply in the power of humor and kindness. He never took himself too seriously and liked to say, “If someone doesn’t have a smile, give them one of yours.” His humor was never at the expense of others, it was meant to bring joy. He loved a good joke, especially a groaner. As Tommy’s daughters can attest, embarrassment was not a word in his vocabulary. He talked to every cashier and server by name, marched through grocery stores proclaiming “Onward,” break-danced on sidewalks with street performers, and cheerfully introduced himself with, “It’s your pleasure to meet me.”

Tommy was preceded in death by his sister Mary Kodner. He is survived by his children Tina Merrill (Jason), Erin Sameck (Matt), and Lauren Engel (Zoey); his three grandchildren Harrison, Caden, and Kal; sister Jane Shook; and his two cats Pinkie and Artie.

Please drop in to celebrate the life of Tommy at an open house on February 15 from 11:30 am to 2:00 pm at 121 West Kansas Street in Liberty, MO. In lieu of flowers donations can be made to Unicef or the Wikimedia Foundation in Tommy’s honor.